P3 - 18 & 19 weeks

I am so bad at blogging.  We had our biggest appointment to date and I haven't written a word about it.  Here we go...

Week 18 - Anatomy Scan and most anticipated doctor's appointment of my life

Our appointment was Friday, December 9th at 9:45am and started right on schedule.  Weight (up almost 20 lbs already for those keeping track, sigh), pee in a cup, vitals and then off to the sono room.  It was immediately apparent that this baby had a healthy brain (who knew this picture could be so exciting!) and was quickly reading ahead of schedule in the size department...75th percentile and 4 days ahead of schedule...usually shocking, in this case praised.  We found out the placenta had moved further down and was partially blocking my cervix.  Dr. Dalton asked me not to google placenta previa until we recheck at 30 weeks because this could resolve on it's own and not be an issue, but did want to make me aware that if the placenta doesn't move out of the way I will be in for a c-section.  Not my first request, but I'm up for it if that's what it comes down to.  Early delivery is often necessary in order to minimize hemorrhaging and just have complete control over the situation, but until we cross that bridge, we'll just focus on the baby.  Femur bones were normal, no signs of a cleft pallet, kidneys look good (happy dance!), all 4 chambers of the heart visible, the cutest little profile with the cutest little button nose, but when she started looking at genitals to confirm sex I realized something was missing.  I looked at Kiel and said, "there's not a penis in that picture."  Everyone in the room laughed and Dr Dalton said she would officially confirm after baby woke up and moved a little, but she was leaning toward girl too.  HOLY CRAP!  The boy parts were SO obvious with Jase & Korban, I think I just expected to see them again, but those 3 lines I'd heard about from friends with girls were clearly staring us in the face. (forgot to print us a gender pic, will ask at next visit)  After some good movement from baby Dr Dalton confirmed we were looking at our daughter....

To back up for a minute:  In the 3 days prior to this appointment, I started to REALLY feel this baby moving.  Each morning for 3 days, between 8am & 9am, I would sit down in my chair at work and immediately feel this tiny human inside of me.  It was so encouraging.  Those tiny kicks finally allowed me to stop thinking the worst about our 18 week appointment and actually look forward to finding out what this baby's gender is.  I had been saying for awhile that I felt like the baby was a girl for a few reasons.  I felt like I was carrying higher, my face looked (to me) more bloated than normal, my butt wasn't AS big as it was with the boys, but the main reason was; I wasn't asking Kiel to go to dairy queen for a blizzard every single night like I did with the boys.  instead, I wanted vegetables and home cooked meals.  BUT, just like with Jase, in the week leading up to our appointment, I started to feel like we were having another boy and to be honest...it made me a little sad.  Even before I was ever ready to have children, I always saw myself with 2 boys and when we found out Korban was a boy I was completely content.  Maybe a twinge of sadness for never seeing bows and colorful leggings in my future, but 99% content with selling my maternity clothes and embracing total #boymom status.  And even now that we've accepted Korban's life in Heaven, I still feel like I am a mom to 2 boys.  I carried him and birthed him and love(d) him.  The thought of having a 3rd boy almost felt like a "replacement" instead of a 3rd baby.  I didn't want him to be "just one of the boys" or for people to say, "Oh it's like you got Korban back."  So when Dr Dalton confirmed we were having a girl, I nervous laughed with Kiel and secretly celebrated.  Not because I wouldn't have loved another boy, but because to me, instead of just filing in a void this baby girl completes our family.  It's different than what I expected, but what about this last year hasn't been?  I got my two boys even if one only lives in my heart and now we're going to have a little girl...our rainbow baby.  It's like a dream come true that I didn't even know I wanted.
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Saturday, December 10th - gender reveal
While most of our family couldn't wait to hear the news, we wanted a fun way to announce it to Jase so I ordered some golf balls off Etsy that explode pink or blue when struck.  Jase was so excited when we told him what we were doing.  Grandpa & Cindy, the Brummel family, Lindsey, our neighbor Jeanne and the surprise visitors of the day, the DeVries clan bundled up and head to the backyard to take pictures and video.  As luck would have it, Lindsey & Suzy were the only ones who got any footage so a big shout out to them for being there and capturing everything! 

Jase had been saying for months that he wanted a sister, but the week before we found out he had switched to wanting a brother after he found a pair of old snow boots that he could share with his brother lol He was sad for a split second when that ball exploded pink, but he's been beaming proud of having a baby sister ever since.  When I told him the Dr told us our baby was very healthy he exclaimed, "She's going to get to come live with us!!"  And when he took the little sister shirt upstairs that I had bought, he held on to it like it was walking up the stairs and said, "Come on baby sister."  He's going to be the best big brother to a little girl...I cannot wait!

Week 19 -

This picture does not do the way I feel justice.  I am sore.  And huge.  My sciatic nerve has been bothering me as the day goes on, but it comes and goes so not a complete issue as of now.  I'm up at least once in the middle of the night to pee, but usually see each hour throughout the night.  I'm constantly out of breath and am pretty reluctant to carry Jase very far or really even pick him up.  Sob.  I honestly feel like I've been pregnant since February so May seems pretty far off, but I know it's true that it will be here before I know it.

On a positive note, I recently stopped taking my anti-nausea meds.  So there's that.  My above list of complaints will be short lived and all worth it once she's here.

I ended up going to the Dr the Monday before we hit 19 weeks because the respiratory infection Jase had passed on to us had really gotten to me.  Kiel had bronchitis treated with antibiotics, a steroid and an inhaler, Jase was on his 2nd round of antibiotics and I thankfully got a z pack.  Yay winter.  I noticed over the weekend that I wasn't feeling her movements like I had before our appointment on Friday so it was reassuring to hear her moving around when we listened to her heartbeat on Monday.  I'm crossing my fingers that might mean my placenta has moved back up preventing me from feeling her movements.  We shall see.

I turned 33 on Wednesday and we celebrated by staying in out of the cold, ordering dinner and having cake...a few of our favorite things!  Jase told me on the way to Kyra's that he got me, "His biggest heart full of all his love."  Where this kid comes up with this stuff, will have us guessing forever I'm sure.  What more could a mother ask for!?!?!  Next year we're getting a babysitter and going out...maybe lol

Thankful for healthy baby news last week and another successful, never boring trip around the sun with my favorites.  Love these crazy boys more than they will ever know....

-Nicole

Jase 18 weeks
Korban 18 weeks